"To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come."
-William Shakespeare, Hamlet
I am having a lot of "to be or not to be" moments in my life lately.
And I think that is the one of the challenges of the Indigo individual.
We are attuned to both the visible and invisible world, and sometimes because of all the shadows in the visible world, it just seems like "why bother?"
To an extent, that is part of my own pattern. Like many indigo folks, I had a challenging childhood,
and had to become an adult way earlier than my physical body matured into being an
adult. Because of this maturation, I was able to do very well in school, learn how to read
people, and understand society from a very young age. I could see "it" all.
Now as I am in my actual adulthood, the challenge of having to be where I am, and not push myself into
a state I am not ready for is very difficult. Why can be so hard to be just where I am?
Because I am resisting it and have such high expectations for myself.
Indigo Dilemna #1: HIGH expectations
Sometimes we have been used to operatng from such high expectations, that one day we cannot
take it anymore and we have to submit to our being a human.
Why is being a human so hard?
Because for most indigos, we know ourself as spirit/soul/activist/teacher/etc before we know
ourself as a human.
The challenge is to enjoy our being human. Even amidst the corruption and shadows, part
of our dharma this lifetime is to be human and to enjoy it. For me, sometimes this is very
hard, and I can get pretty existential about things.
WHY BOTHER? WHY WHY WHY????
WHY?
I simply don't know. And that is why I ask those things, hoping that one day I will have
the answer. Today I settle in not knowing, but knowing I am human, have human needs
and wants, and I surrender to that.
And I think that is the one of the challenges of the Indigo individual.
We are attuned to both the visible and invisible world, and sometimes because of all the shadows in the visible world, it just seems like "why bother?"
To an extent, that is part of my own pattern. Like many indigo folks, I had a challenging childhood,
and had to become an adult way earlier than my physical body matured into being an
adult. Because of this maturation, I was able to do very well in school, learn how to read
people, and understand society from a very young age. I could see "it" all.
Now as I am in my actual adulthood, the challenge of having to be where I am, and not push myself into
a state I am not ready for is very difficult. Why can be so hard to be just where I am?
Because I am resisting it and have such high expectations for myself.
Indigo Dilemna #1: HIGH expectations
Sometimes we have been used to operatng from such high expectations, that one day we cannot
take it anymore and we have to submit to our being a human.
Why is being a human so hard?
Because for most indigos, we know ourself as spirit/soul/activist/teacher/etc before we know
ourself as a human.
The challenge is to enjoy our being human. Even amidst the corruption and shadows, part
of our dharma this lifetime is to be human and to enjoy it. For me, sometimes this is very
hard, and I can get pretty existential about things.
WHY BOTHER? WHY WHY WHY????
WHY?
I simply don't know. And that is why I ask those things, hoping that one day I will have
the answer. Today I settle in not knowing, but knowing I am human, have human needs
and wants, and I surrender to that.
